As I see my friends go through breakups, I think to my past relationships & I came to a conclusion: men are cowards during breakups***.

When you are dating, men show chivalry (thank you, parents). They know how to respect a woman, they know how to show her a good time & they know how to make her feel special. But when it comes to breakups, these men have no idea what they are doing.

Men all over the world are pulling a trick from the Irish’s playbook. Too many relationships are ended with an Irish Exit Breakup. For those who don’t know, an Irish Exit is to leave without telling anyone. That’s basically what these men are doing. They are so blinded by their own feelings that they don’t think about how these actions affect the person they used to love. Or, they just don’t care.

Breakups show the true side to people. It shows that no matter how many memories you built together, promises you made to each other, secrets you told, feelings you shared- when a man is over it, he’s over it. & you will be left in the dust.

The worst part of an Irish Exit Breakup is seeing that the man of your dreams is actually unempathetic & that destroys you all over again because it makes you question whether you ever knew him at all.

The second worst part of an Irish Exit Breakup is you are left crying all alone without a sense of closure. You are left standing there crying & hyperventilating as he walks away because you know that was not closure.

But the feeling of needing closure is actually just your heart yearning to be with your best friend because you are hurt. All you want to do is cry into your best friend’s arms after a breakup, but this time you can’t because the man that broke your heart is also your best friend.

Now what? Your heart is broken into a million little pieces & you can’t imagine a world without this man. You can’t eat, you can’t focus at work or school & all you can do is think about all of the good times you shared & everything you were supposed to do to together. The vacations you planned, the Sunday night dinners, the study/gym sessions, the post-work wine vents- all of these expectations destroyed.

As he walks off & continues with his life, you are left to pick up the mess that is your crumbled life.

From a girl who survived an Irish Exit Breakup after a long relationship, I am here to tell you- you survive. You continue on with your daily routine because you are strong, you cry with friends & family because you are loved, you scream into a pillow & get drunk because you need to let off steam, you eat a lot of ice cream & go to the yoga because it will make you feel better, you take a bath & throw out/give away his stuff because you need to cleanse yourself of him. & eventually, you will begin to feel normal again.

& when it’s all over & done with- you end up a stronger, more brilliant, confident & strikingly beautiful woman than ever before.

* No, not all men are assholes. I am obviously making a generalization, calm down.

** Yes, I know women can be assholes too.